My Thoughts on Facebook

Warning: This is a highly opinionated post. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions; this is MY opinion and is not intended to offend anyone.

There once was a time when I actually enjoyed getting on Facebook. I liked posting pictures of what was going on in my life, mainly pictures of me, my cat, or random things. I loved to post status' and see what responses I got from them and how many likes I would get. And I enjoyed reading and looking through what other people on my friends list were posting as well. I even did a little Facebook stalking from time to time (come one we are all guilty of this!).

Now, it's different. Don't get me wrong, I still do hop on Facebook from time to time but now it is only about once a week as opposed to 3-4 times a day (WHOA what a change!). I no longer post status' and in the past 8ish months I have only posted 2 pictures. When I do get on, it is mainly to read what other people are saying. Typically I read for a few minutes; get aggravated and then log off.

I do not understand WHY people feel the need to tell their 564654 friends on Facebook everything they are doing! Stop worrying about telling other people what you are doing in your life and just do it! Live your life! It almost seems like some people are slaves to Facebook, like they HAVE to post what they are doing, when they are doing it, where they are, all the cute pics they are taking. I guess you may even venture to say some people are addicted to Facebook. Maybe some are just so lonely, or bored? Who knows. I have found that the most important things in life are things that are not found online. God and family. How can you worship God or spend time with your family if you are so worried about posting about it on Facebook? Don't you feel weighed down? Having to pull out your cell to post a status that you and the kids are at the Dairy Queen? Why not just GO to the Dairy Queen and enjoy it instead? Why report it to others? Are you trying to make them jealous? Or are you trying to make a image for yourself? So when people think of you they think of you as the mom who takes her kids to do fun things like get ice cream? The fact of the matter is, if people base their opinions of you off the stuff you post on Facebook, they must not know you very well. Why would you want to tell all that stuff to strangers?!? I just don't understand. Please feel free to explain.

I know some of you may be thinking, "Well you do the same thing with your blog!". This is true, to an extent. Blogging is a hobby for me. I do it because I like to write and because I want to have a written journal like thing of the days when my son was growing up, so I can later go back and read them. I know that not very many people look at my blog and I have this blog for me not for anyone else. I post so I can remember my thoughts and things I am doing in my life, not to see what people's reactions are.

Another thing that bothers me: how easy it is for information to reach people through Facebook. I have no pictures of my son on Facebook because I feel it is not safe. I fear for his life and for mine and for Anthony's. Why you may ask? This is because I fear that if my ex (the father of my first son) finds out I have another baby and a family and I am HAPPY that he will get angered and then find out where I live and come and kill us all in our sleep. This may sound silly but this is a TRUE fear. The man is crazy and unstable and that is something that he would do. Facebook would make it very easy for him to contact some mutual friends or random people that commented on something on my page and dig to find where I live. It really blows my mind that there is actually a site out there that offers up so much personal information about a person and their life. It is almost like inviting someone to stalk you. Even if you do not have a page or your page is private, there is STILL information about you in some form or another on Facebook! It is all on other people's pages, you just have to know which ones to click on. This just blows my mind.

Some days I feel Facebook should be shut down, but then I remember the business aspect of it. I do believe that it is a wonderful tool for business' to use to reach potential buyers and for buyers to discover new things. Other than that, I think it is a pretty bad thing to have all that info about yourself out there on the web, in such a known place. Blogs are different, because people can not simply go "Hmmm I wonder what Rose is doing... let me look up her blog!" They have to know your blog first, and in order for them to know your blog chances are you will have to give it to them.

Some days I think about de-activating my Facebook, but I never do. The reason is because they have made it almost necessary to have one! Which is ridiculous! There are some people that the only way I can contact them is through Facebook, forcing me to keep one for those times when I need to contact those people.

It seems like as time goes by people are falling more and more into Facebook and more and more info is being posted on there. For now I can only hope that it will die out someday. But I somehow do not see that happening.

Goals: April

Here's  how I did on last months goals:

1. Set up Bear’s room - Check (All though it still needs to be painted and made cute)
2. Paint at least 2 walls of Bear’s room - Fail
3. Finish playing Kirby Yarn - Fail (We had to cancel our Game Fly so this got sent back)
4. Paint at least one wall in the living room - Fail (We did not have enough money to buy the paint)
5. Apply for Food Stamps - Check (We found out we can't get them)
6. Help Anthony look for a job - Check well kinda (We decided that we were going to hold off on this)
7. Take Charlie for lots of walks - Half a check? (We started going on walks with Charlie but only did a few not a lot)
8. Read the Bible more - Fail (I really want to beat myself up over this, I keep putting it on my list but it never gets done, life is just so hectic, and I know that is NO excuse but it is hard to remember to sit and read the Bible when you have so much going on.)
9. Make a decision about whether or not I am going to sell on Etsy again - Check (We decided that we are)
10. Devise a more stable finance plan - Check
11. Get Anthony’s desk set up the rest of the way - Fail
12. Find and try some DIY decorating things for my house - Fail (I have had no time for something so petty as decorating lol)
13. Make a trip to Good Will to see if we can find some cute cheap decor - Fail (Was going to do this and had it planned out but we decided not to due to lack of funds
14. Lose at least 2 lbs  - No clue. (Anthony won't let me weigh myself because he doesn't want me to get upset if the scale doesn't say what I want it to)  

Looks like I reached 50% of my goals in the month of March. That is not bad but I would like to be reaching at least 70%.

Here are April's Goals:

1.  Finish making crayons for Etsy shop
2. Set up and list items in Etsy shop
3. Make at least 5 sales in Etsy shop
4. Make a Facebook and Twitter for my Etsy shop and start using them
5. Spend more time with Bear
6. Read the Bible more
7. Don't overspend
8. NO impulse purchases
9. Paint one wall of Bear's Room
10. Lose at lease 2 lbs
11. Organize the house more
12. Get the lights fixed (a lot of my lights are burnt out)
13. Set up the rest of Anthony's desk
14. Get more motivated to make money on Etsy

Here we go into another month! Life is one crazy ride!

12 Weeks Old!

Well more like 12.75 weeks old seeing as this post is 5 days late :O I really can not believe Bear is 3 months old! Well he is not officially 3 months old until tomorrow but still. It feels almost as if it is going by really slow but at the same time it feels like it is flying by. I go back and look at the pictures of him from when he was a month old and younger and it just blows my mind how fast he is growing! Makes me wanna cry.

Personality: Bear is definitely becoming more "fun" now. He is laughing, and developing a sense of humor. He he likes to meet new people and even smiles for them all the time too! He is turning into one sweet boy.

Growth: He is currently in a size 2 diaper (we are still using Pampers Swaddlers) and size 0-3 months clothes. This past week we put up 90% of his newborn sized clothes because they are officially too snug, especially around the shoulders. He weighs 13 lbs and 2 oz and is in the 49th percentile. I am not sure of his current height. Last month he was a little over 11 lbs so he gained about 2 lbs this month!

Features: This child looks like his father. It is coming out more and more everyday and he is also reaching that stage of cute baby look rather than the newborn look.

Health: For the first time we had a little bump in the road concerning heath. About 4 days ago he developed diarrhea. He was (and still is) pooping about 6-8 times a day rather than his normal 1-2. We took him to the doctor yesterday and she said since he did not have a fever or any other symptoms, it was hard to tell what it is. So she told us to give him Pedialite in every other bottle for two days, and just see if it stops. We got him the strawberry kind and he does like it. :] She said setting that aside he looks very healthy.

Eating: We are still on 4 oz every 2-3 hours. He is starting to want 5 oz more though so I think we may go up to 5 oz pretty soon.

Sleeping: We have developed a pretty good sleeping routine by now. We normally swaddle him at around 7:30 and give him a bottle so he goes to bed. Sometimes he will wake at around 9 for another bottle and other days he will not. Sometimes he will not go to sleep after his bottle and we have to give him his binky and cover his eyes til he falls asleep because he is much too interested in looking around the room. He is still waking up at 4 and 6:30 for another bottle and then waking for the day at around 8-9:30.

How we are adjusting: Anthony and I a adjusting very well. We are starting to fall more into a routine and things seem more relaxed then it did when he was first born. We know what he wants 90% of the time so there is less hectic crying episodes. We are working together great as a team and I am so very thankful that we are a family. As the days go by our family bond grows stronger and stronger and Bear is a huge part of this bond. I love my family so much, and I can now proudly say that I have the family that I have longed for for everyday of my life as far back as I can remember (and I can remember all the way back to when I was 3 years old).

Baby's First Laugh

A few days ago on March 25 Bear surprised us with his first laugh! I was playing with him, just mainly by singing and talking and saying silly things, and he was smiling and smiling so much! Then out of nowhere he started laughing! Anthony was near by but was not really paying attention but he came over and we were able to get him to laugh one more time. Since then we have not heard him laugh again but I think it is kind of like the smiling thing, it just takes time. When he first started smiling he only did it once or twice and then we went a few days between seeing smiles, but now he smiles everyday :] Hearing him laugh brought an intense amount of joy to my heart. It's the small things that make us happy in life <3 Hope everyone is having a great Spring Break! We are! I will post about all the things we have been up to on next Monday.

Monday Memory: Riding my Bike to School

For my 7th birthday I asked my dad for a bike. I remember this bike oh so well. It was sea foam green and had pink and purple accents. A little doll basket in the front and tassels hanging from the handle bars. I removed the basket and tassels because they were just not my thing, but I LOVED my bike!

On the day of my party, I was very upset I do not recall the exact reason but I do remember sitting under my desk in my room crying and everyone trying to drag me into the kitchen to celebrate. I was not happy as a child at all. I felt like my life was one big mistake. Most of these feelings stemmed from my mother abandoning me and my dad getting married to a woman who clearly resented me (all though she had not become abusive yet at that point) I just knew she did not want me around by the way she treated me, talked to me, and even looked at me. It was very apparent that I was cramping her dream life style.

Once they dragged me out of my room and I saw my new bike (the exact one I asked for) I was so happy! Little things like new toys could make me happy for a few days before I went back to hating my existence. I think about that today and it kinda blows my mind, like what 7 year old would hate being alive? When you think of that age you think of kids that are care free and I almost want to say that a 7 year old could not even think that way but that is not true because I did.

The very next day my sister taught me how to ride with out training wheels. Yep that is right, not my dad or my mom. My sister who was 9. I was thankful for this. We had lots of fun learning and riding with our friends across the street Elizabeth and William.

The day came where I wanted to ride my bike to school. My school was a good mile from my house. We normally walked there, my sister and I because at the time Elizabeth was going to a different school that her mom worked at and William was not even in school yet. I think about this now and it seems kind of odd to me that my dad and his wife would let a 7 and 9 year old walk a mile to school everyday. But then again... it was 1998 and times were different. My younger sister is now 13 and they won't even let her walk to the bus stop alone! And that is literally 5 houses down from theirs. Crazy.

So, my sister and I rode our bikes to school. Mine was all nice and shiny and hers was old and rusty. Must have looked kinda odd. I wish they would have bought her a new bike too. Thinking back, it seemed pretty unfair. But at 7 you don't think about those sort of things.

I really enjoyed riding my bike but I was not really all that good at it yet, so I fell off... a lot! I remember going into school (I was in the first grade). And going straight to the clinic balling my eyes out screaming "I need a band-aid!" because I had skinned both my knees to all hell. I thought a band aid would make it feel all better lol. Silly how kids think. I always stopped crying as soon as I got one too.

After a while of this the nurse said to me something to the effect of "If you are going to keep falling off your bike every morning maybe you shouldn't ride it to school". This really upset me because I liked my bike and I loved riding it to school, not having to walk was so great to me. I agreed with her and left to my class.

The next day, I still rode my bike to school, but this time I packed band-aids in my backpack and when I fell off my bike, I took one out and put it on.

After a while I got a hang of the bike and no longer needed the band-aids and after some months maybe even a year my bike stopped working and my dad never did buy me a new one. So that was the end of my bike riding-to school days.

11 Weeks Old!

Late post because Bear turned 11 weeks old 3 days ago.

New things he is doing this week:

Eating his hands: He never used to do this until just now. He constantly has his hands in his mouth and slobber every where! It is cute lol I did not know babies did this at such a young age. The only thing is he spits up a lot and so when he sticks his hands in his mouth they end up smelling like puke. Ick.

Rolling over: He can't quite do it yet but he sure is trying! as you can see I caught it in this picture :] He can half way roll over now. I am pretty sure he will be all the way rolling over pretty soon.

More interest in the world around him: Bear has started to notice the things around him more. As you can see in this picture he is looking at the keys Daddy is holding. He actually loves those keys. He would rather look at them than his toys. He does watch TV now too! Like he not only listens but watches the screen. He likes Sesame Street and Yo Gabba Gabba.

Sleep: His sleeping pattern has changed a little this week. He is now sleeping from 7:30ish to 4 am! YAY! So he is almost sleeping through the night. He wakes at 4 for a bottle and goes back to sleep and then wakes at 6:30 for another bottle and goes back to sleep til 9:30 when he wakes for another bottle and to stay up for the day. He is taking about 3-4, 2-3 hour naps a day. The only thing is it is very HARD to get him to sleep at 7:30. He gets really really tired and fights his sleep. He screams bloody murder til he finally does fall asleep. I really hope the bedtime process changes soon.

Growth: We went up to a size two diaper this week! Not because we chose to but because Publix did not have any size 1s left in Papers Swadlers (and we refuse to buy any other brand or kind). Turns out size two fits him great so we are gonna stick with it for a while. I think he got taller as well because a lot of his NB clothes is becoming too small. I think I may put all of his NB stuff away soon and take out all the 0-3 months stuff. I also noticed he has long arms! It's like the outfit will fit but if it is long sleeved the arms will be too short. Maybe he will play a sport when he gets older like tennis maybe? 

Eating: We are still feeding him 4 oz ever 2 to 3 hours. He is still doing good with it for the most part but sometimes he just gets super hungry and screams for more. So we offer him 2 more oz but most of the time he will only take one more. So he is basically at 4-5 oz every 2-3 hours now.

First real boo boo: Kind of hard to see but this was his first boo boo. It was from his nail! This one is pretty bad it has been there for about a week and still has not healed like the gimpy little scratches he got as a NB. My poor baby.

Spring Break

So as most of you know, Spring Break is next week! For me it starts in about 20 minutes. I just wanted to let everyone know that I may take a small break from blogging over the next 10 days because I will likely be ultra busy! I do have some pre-written posts that I will post here and there but other than that this blog will be a ghost town over the next week and a half.

I will have my cute little Bear to spend tons of time with, I have a birthday party to go to, a beach trip planned, several trips to stores to pick up things for my Etsy launch, lots of cleaning and organizing to do, and LOTS AND LOTS + some more of crayon making and Etsy planing to do. We plan to launch our first Etsy shop on March 7th. My fingers are crossed that we can list at least 75 products in that shop by March 18th.

The goal is to make approximately $75 a day and once we get there (we are hopping we will reach this in 3-5 months) we plan to launch our second Etsy shop with an ultimate goal to make combined salary of $130 a day (we hope to reach this goal in 6-12 months). I am SO very determined to make this happen and I refuse to give up until I reach my goals. Please say a prayer for me! I see many many sleepless nights ahead of me.